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Neil's Log

Hi @lil-chick and thank you for the welcome. The problem with the long haul is I've played it so many times with other fad diets, and I'm a breaking point where I literally can't afford to get any worse. I could wait years and be the same, as most people here seem to be.  

@neil here a few answers to your questions:

"Are you sure you are actually improving?"

Yes. I have written every month in detail what is happening to me and my husband here: https://ggenereux.blog/discussion/topic/ouranias-log/

"Are you sure you aren't just messing up your eyes through lack of vitamin A?"

Yes. Prior to trying this Vitamin A thing, my eyes were deteriorating very fast. Had been for about ten years. I had all kinds of troubles, some of which disappeared completely. No more blepharitis, no more dry eyes, no more rosacea of the eye, no more stabbing pains behind the eyes, no more nystagmus. I still have cataracts getting worse (I think), light sensitivity half of the time, difficult to focus. All problems I had BEFORE trying this diet. I was eating lots of VA foods, so these problems were NOT from VA deficiency, but an eye doctor prescribed VA and this just added to my problems.

Also on this diet my husband had lost most of his Daltonism, small cataracts gone entirely and this in less than a year!

I cannot say we are getting worse, certainly not.

A lot of things are better.

Depression is on and off. Considering the alternative, we shall stay firmly on the diet.

I do not want to convince anyone. I only write here our experiences, truthfully. It may help someone. Good luck!

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Jenny

Thanks @ourania. I appreciate that response, and that has definitely left me feeling a bit more positive.  I will check out your log in full. I'm really pleased you are improving. 

@neil

The thing that keeps me on my lowered-VA diet is the amazing lessening of migraines and head pressure and the feeling of being less sore when trying to sleep.  And I bounce back from things easier.

My face still looks like crap.  😉   But should I really expect overnight healing?  We aren't talking magic here.  I seem to be in a detox mode right now.  It sucks. 

I drink a little raw milk, I am not on a zero VA diet.

I once saw a grave that said "I told you I was sick".  I think that person had high VA, LOL.  I don't think it kills you fast.  It just makes life miserable.  Well, I suppose it does occasionally kill you fast.  But the people in my life just don't get why I have become a hermit over time.

You are for sure right that VA isn't everything.  But it is very basic. 

On bad days, paste a smile on and bust through.  :')

BTW, I'm a decade younger than @ourania, and I want to be her when I grow up.

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JennyOurania

@neil

I understand your frustration. I'm in the same boat as you, and the past couple of months I've felt horrible to say the least. Well, I've felt horrible for 3.5 years now, and still struggled before that, but it seems to get harder and harder because I feel like I have tried everything a million times. And really given my all. I've pushed so hard, and feel plain burnt out. I'm definitely deep in learned helplessness. Suicidal thoughts, but more like mental entertaining(?), like it would be better to be dead than being a living dead like I am now... So that's where I'm at.  

I've been on the diet for well over 18 months, and I am still sick. The reason I still do it, is because I feel it is the right thing to do. And also, I must admit, I'm scared of eating more VA, for fear of losing out, kind of. I desperately need it to work. I had such a huge intake of VA for many years, and before that I took Accutane for 8 months. Do I know for sure that that is what caused this fu#ked up state that I'm in? No. But it is likely it was a major factor. But it could be many different things. Like the low carb diets I did. High fat diets are known to break down the gut and could have given me a fatty liver. I slept 2 metres from a wifi router for 5 years (the floor over my bedroom). That could have been a factor. There could be many causes for this. 

So the main reason I still do the diet is the stress reduction. My whole life I was severely stressed out. I felt I was always on edge. And  like a week into the the low VA diet, this stressed out feeling just vanished, and it has not come back. I feel much more calm and in the moment now. The stress also came along with a sort of low-level underlying depression, and that is also gone. Although this drop in stress (cortisol?) does come with some negative consequences, in my opinion. This stress would push me to do things, and gave me motivation. Now the problem is that I lack this push to get things done, and I also have severely low dopamine, so I'm left in a pretty much chronic anhedonic state. 

I also had pretty bad involuntary head movements (for lack of better words) or head twitches. Basically I would get startled very easily. This is pretty much entirely gone now. 

I had dry eyes, and that is now gone. 

Going to the bathroom 3 times a night before the diet, is now down to zero. I sleep deeply through the night without any disruptions (sleep has always been my strong point no matter what I've done though). 

I always had some sort of itching in my jaw. That is also mostly gone now. 

I could probably go on, but I`d say that those are the main improvements that keep me going on this diet. 

Still, I don't think depleting Vitamin A from the body is totally necessary. I specifically think of my own case here. A year back I kind of put all my eggs in this basket, and I'm sure I have wasted a lot of time by doing that. Waiting, and doing nothing besides "detoxing" VA, is a waste of time in my opinion. There are other ways to heal, I'm absolutely convinced about that. What that is for me, I don't know. I'm sort of staring into the abyss right now.

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rockarolla
Quote from lil chick on November 19, 2020, 9:29 am

@neil

The thing that keeps me on my lowered-VA diet is the amazing lessening of migraines and head pressure and the feeling of being less sore when trying to sleep.  And I bounce back from things easier.

My face still looks like crap.  😉   But should I really expect overnight healing?  We aren't talking magic here.  I seem to be in a detox mode right now.  It sucks. 

I drink a little raw milk, I am not on a zero VA diet.

I once saw a grave that said "I told you I was sick".  I think that person had high VA, LOL.  I don't think it kills you fast.  It just makes life miserable.  Well, I suppose it does occasionally kill you fast.  But the people in my life just don't get why I have become a hermit over time.

You are for sure right that VA isn't everything.  But it is very basic. 

On bad days, paste a smile on and bust through.  :')

BTW, I'm a decade younger than @ourania, and I want to be her when I grow up.

So low VA helps you with head pressure/migraines? That's my main (physical) symptom. It has definitely improved for me on this diet, but it still is a major problem.

Quote from Pinetreefire on November 19, 2020, 10:05 am
Quote from lil chick on November 19, 2020, 9:29 am

@neil

The thing that keeps me on my lowered-VA diet is the amazing lessening of migraines and head pressure and the feeling of being less sore when trying to sleep.  And I bounce back from things easier.

My face still looks like crap.  😉   But should I really expect overnight healing?  We aren't talking magic here.  I seem to be in a detox mode right now.  It sucks. 

I drink a little raw milk, I am not on a zero VA diet.

I once saw a grave that said "I told you I was sick".  I think that person had high VA, LOL.  I don't think it kills you fast.  It just makes life miserable.  Well, I suppose it does occasionally kill you fast.  But the people in my life just don't get why I have become a hermit over time.

You are for sure right that VA isn't everything.  But it is very basic. 

On bad days, paste a smile on and bust through.  :')

BTW, I'm a decade younger than @ourania, and I want to be her when I grow up.

So low VA helps you with head pressure/migraines? That's my main (physical) symptom. It has definitely improved for me on this diet, but it still is a major problem.

Hi @pinetreefire, yes.  During this process I've realized that my "everything must go" nights are actually migraines, called "CVS" or chronic vomiting syndrome.  It is a more typical way for children to be migrainers.  I was getting to the point where I would have one almost monthly.  I have had 3 episodes in 18 months.   That is probably my most debilitating symptom that I have, and any reduction is welcome.

I have, in my life, had about 3 classic migraines with aura.  I have had zero on lowered VA.

Before lowered VA I'd been having headaches without aura, some lasting a few days and often traceable to some sort of hormonal activity.  But not always.   These were making my life smaller.    I have only had low level "hangover" type detox headaches on lowered-VA. 

I even feel that my eyes appear to be less "bulging" in my face.

In my opinion, some of this pressure is due to a real shrinkage in tissues, and I would expect that this may take lots of time to reverse.  Stretching helps.  (smile)

As for the CVS, I think that my body recognizes when too many poisons have come in and decides it's better to send everything out than it is to try to sock it away.  Unlike many here, I have no weight issues, so there's that.  (tired face)

I think that other things (besides VA) come down the same detox pathways, and will add to the chances of having a vomiting attack (CVS).   Some of these things are aldehydes and alcohol.  I've got my suspicions about several other things.  I suspect that many people who think they are "environmentally sensitive" are VA-overloaded. 

I think that the reason CVS attacks happen on a "regular basis" for people is that their "bucket" becomes full.  Then they have a massive horrible detox.  Then they are 100% normal, between bouts, until the bucket refills.

The body loves stasis.

I think one of the most indicative things about CVS is that people seem absolutely normal between bouts.

@lil-chick

Thanks for the detailed replies. I should probably not call it a migraine then, it´s a chronic sinus pressure (without congestion) what I have. This CVS doesn't sound good either though. It reminds me of the flu in a sense. I always used to have the flu a few times a year, and I always felt a lot better afterwards, but now I haven't had one for years. I'm just chronically ill all the time, but milder. I think this could be a key to understand my situation actually. I could expand on this, but I´ll stop here since this is Neil´s log.

@neil

Welcome and good luck to you! You can easily go on a zero vitamin A diet for 18 months without needing to have any concern about vitamin A deficiency. 

If you haven't checked out Garrett Smith's detox protocol, I highly recommend it. It's $60 but good value for money. There is lots and lots of information there about how to avoid detox symptoms and also another very active and supportive social network of other people on a low vitamin A detox diet: https://nutrition-restored.mn.co/

About people with eye problems on the diet: If you look at the analysis I did of the recent 'community survey' (which Grant added to the top of his recent post), you'll see that, on average, people are seeing some improvements with various vision problems, and the longer they've been on the diet, the greater the improvement they've seen.

Detoxing this stuff is a slow process, so don't expect amazing results in the short term. Some people have them, but for some it takes longer.  

 

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